My Daughter's Freshman Scholar's Assignment...

I have not blogged in a while...kids, the house, various catastrophies have all conspired to keep me from being really, truly creative. I don't have to be, though, because I have Ione's schoolwork to thrill and inspire me.
School sure has changed a lot since I went. I don't know if my teachers would have understood what my child has written here, but I hope that *her* teachers have a good sense of humor. Having said that, I present to you Ione's Freshman Scholar's Assignment:


Zeus’s Umbrella

Zeus’s Umbrella is a magic device that protects you from Zeus’s evil rains. You will always be safe under the protection of zeus’s umbrella ella ella. They are magic and can help you fly. They come in every color except purple, white, and chartreuse. Zeus’s umbrellas can be used for protection, hiding, assaulting and lightning reflecting. They can also do your homework and walk your dog. ORDER NOW AT USEPROTECTION.COM OR CALL 666-6666 AND GET YOU ZEUS’S UMBRELLA FOR FIVE EASY PAYMENTS OF $29.95. ZEUS’S UMBRELLAS MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE. All you have to do is believe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So order now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Useprotection.com

666-6666

USE PROTECTION. DON’T GET WET


Our tax dollars at work so that Ione can practice her comedic skills. I am so proud.